Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
