Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
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