is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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