There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.