so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
