so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize