Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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