My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize