I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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