Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize