Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize