just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize