She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
