coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
