I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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