Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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