did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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