Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
