So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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