my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
