it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
