Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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