what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I won't apologize to a one balled man
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize