Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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