i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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