I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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