Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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