Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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