I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
