My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize