i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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