Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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