oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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