Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea