I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
