hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize