dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize