Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
