I just cut my nipple shaving
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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