Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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