I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
We need a shit load of segways right now
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
