Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
