i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
