I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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