this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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