I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
