Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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