He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
