Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize