WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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